Losing what's Golden

Losing what’s Golden:

I sit here as still as calm summer day, analyzing my past choices, comments, and dreams. While sitting here, I remember things are not always what they seem. So I begin to dig deeper. Deeper in thought...Deeper in soul, and spirit. I know for a fact that my hearts has been filled, drilled, and smashed up. I also know for a fact that, in life you can die and be resurrected again. I say these things because today a thought came to mind. I feel like you are really losing me. Before, all of this seemed to be like playing a chess game where ever move you make is a move to counter act your opponent. Well, today I put up my white flag. No more mind games, no more confusion, no more feeling distressed.
Today, I am content but not at peace. I am not a peace because I know and feel that there is a peace missing. I understand that but she does not. She feels it but she rebels against it. She is petrified with fear that her emotions will lead her astray. She is consumed with her struggles, her mistakes, and her pain. She can not break from it. It has a hold on her. She is blinded by my growing phase. She can not see the man that I am today, but I know she feels my spirit b/c we share the same. She is losing me because I am wanting...She is losing me because she can not see through the fog. She is losing me because....others feel her lost.

You see when you stand out side the box, you have a different perspective. You approach issue differently b/c you attempt to not repeat the same mistakes. You can foster a relationship which has no beginning, but you can not replace a spiritual connection that is destine to never have an ending....but at last I feel that you are losing me so today I just need to say....